Since I can remember, I have always had problems in my relationships with “others” and mainly in family and love relationships.
Injustice, Abandonment, Rejection, Betrayal, Humiliation, the 5 wounds as they are called were constantly repeated in my life. Over and over again.
The details of the stories and the characters involved changed every time, of course, but deep down I could see that everything was repeated over and over again.
One summer day in 2014, I decided not to look for another “lover” to “forget” the wounds of past disappointed loves. And I decided……
No more bandages… No more crutches… No more looking for answers to my woes in the stories themselves, to try to understand who is right and who is wrong. Who to blame and what to complain about…
I left the wounds open and went inside to explore them, one by one, even recalling past stories.
I looked inside for the mechanism that caused such suffering by completely putting aside the characters and stories that had triggered it in me.
I turned my gaze completely inward and decided that I would use each of these experiences to turn my gaze inward. The life review has begun….
Intuitively I understood that all this could not be the result of chance, as there were far too many “coincidences”, so I went to explore the inner message that these experiences brought me.
Describing each message to you would be too long and useless, we would also miss the essential point, which is the turning of the gaze inwards.
I’m just giving my testimony on something that’s easy to understand. Blaming the outside world for what you feel is not the answer. It has never been and never will be, so if you want to avoid wasting time and repeating lessons through suffering, I invite you to turn your gaze inward as soon as possible.
My evolution since then has been very fast, I saw everything that happened to me as a beneficial opportunity to go and see inside me, the characters and stories no longer mattered, they had become mirrors, and I blessed every mirror, every opportunity to go and see deep inside me where it hurt, what it triggered and how I could ACT internally and change things, no longer outside, but inside.
By doing this simple practice, my life totally changed and I was able to validate through experience that the universe was intelligent, that nothing, never, ever, had happened by chance, which also allowed me to forgive all the “characters” and stories in my individual life movie. And more importantly, it allowed me to forgive “The Source of All That Is”. I started loving God again, whom I had banished from my heart.
I discovered the extraordinary intelligence that is LIFE, God, Consciousness, no matter what the name… at that time I am talking to you about, I was obviously still in duality.
From there I experienced true forgiveness, not of the mind, but of the heart.
Forgiveness has become GRATITUDE, and in the end, everything is perfect there is nothing to forgive, just gratitude. And this inner eye of the heart that was opening more and more…
My worries did not stop immediately, but finally they evolved, they no longer had the same emotional intensity and they became more and more subtle, like new mirrors to go more into inner details, each time it became more and more refined, the mechanisms, more and more visible, the unconscious became more and more conscious. I was no longer in stagnation and repetition in the same way but in subtle exploration. And the outside world adapted every time I unlocked things deep inside me, the world began to reflect itself differently, the world changed. Because I was changing….
Thereafter, having direct experiences and thus an absolute confirmation of the supreme intelligence that governs the universe, I fell in love with this Higher Intelligence. Yes, I was always in duality, but I was getting closer to this Infinitely Intelligent Source, communicating with Her, praying to Her, asking Her for advice, and asking Her to melt into Her.
This led me in 2017 to the Union and the exit of duality. At least to a first experience of fusion, not definitive then, but an absolute certainty that the process was underway and that nothing could stop it. Since then, I went back and forth between duality and Unity, but the “landing strip” was then marked out. I couldn’t get lost anymore.
The rest is up to you to find out.
Let the inner journey begin and all your sufferings disappear.
Take the time, enjoy every moment of this journey. It’s not a race.
But be assured that your success is already guaranteed if you look inwards. Because all the answers are in you.
Namaste
L.
